Taking care of elderly parents at home can be rewarding. Many seniors prefer to age in a familiar place, encouraging adult children to have aging parents live at home instead of residential care facilities.
However, caregiving encompasses huge responsibilities. Your loved one’s degree of mobility and independence impacts the type of work to expect. You typically need to assist with their daily activities, offer emotional support and manage medical needs — on top of your full-time job and other responsibilities.
Caregivers usually spend several hours a week caring for their loved ones. Aging adults also have evolving needs, affecting the level of care you should provide. Sufficient planning and preparation are essential for quality and effective care. In this guide, Village Caregiving details the steps to take and what to expect in the process.
Tips for Taking Care of an Elderly Loved One in Your Home
If you’re taking care of your aging parent, family member, friend or neighbor, then you’re considered an informal caregiver. Seniors who prefer to age at home are considered “aging in place” and can receive in-home care services for the short or long term.
As a caregiver, you typically assist with household tasks, personal care, medical care, food preparation and money matters. Here’s how you can get started:
1. Prepare and Assess Your Capacity for Care
First, plan for your loved one’s needs now and in the future. Consider whether they have illnesses, such as diabetes or heart disease, and understand how these conditions affect their daily activities.
Once you identify such needs, assess how much you can accommodate. For instance, your aging parent may only need help with bathing. This makes it easier to work on other responsibilities, such as work or errands. Caring for your loved one is an active role, but home care services can help you if you need them.
Additionally, prepare for caregiving costs. Even without professional caregivers, you need to account for medication, mobility aids and additional groceries. Home care services are usually more affordable than residential care facilities. However, government programs also provide financial assistance when caring for your loved ones.
2. Ensure Your Home Is Safe and Accessible
Your home needs to be safe enough for your loved one to move about. A safe environment maintains their independence, while potentially reducing accidents and injuries. Check each area of your home and identify safety issues. Fix the most immediate dangers first, such as poor lighting and loose stair railings. You may also consider:
- Installing grab bars: Grab bars near the toilet, bathtub and shower provide stable support for your loved one when using the restroom.
- Removing tripping hazards: Securing loose rugs and electrical cords and using nonslip mats for bathrooms can reduce or prevent falls, especially for seniors who use walkers or wheelchairs. You should also maintain a clear path to walk through when navigating each area of the house.
- Securing dangerous items: Lock or clean up hazardous items, such as chemicals, sharp objects and medications, especially if your loved one has cognitive impairments, such as dementia.
Regularly check for safety issues and address them promptly. The federal government, state housing finance agencies, community development groups or social services departments may be able to help with payments for home safety renovations.
3. Plan and Prepare Nutritious Meals
Nutrition plays a key role in maintaining your loved one’s health. Consider consulting with a nutritionist for a meal plan, which may include fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins and healthy fats. Note any dietary restrictions that impact your loved one’s health issues, such as high blood pressure or diabetes. Food that’s easier to consume is important for seniors who have trouble with chewing or swallowing.
Additionally, encourage your loved one to drink plenty of water to stay hydrated. Other healthy beverages may be beneficial, including herbal tea and low-fat milk. If preparing meals on your own is challenging, consider meal delivery services that cater to unique dietary needs. Having your loved one prepare the meals with you, if possible, can also help them gain a sense of independence.
4. Accompany Your Loved One in Various Activities
Seniors need to stay physically and mentally active to avoid feelings of loneliness. Activities, like exercise, can also alleviate potential illnesses and improve your loved one’s strength and balance. Remember to supervise them during physical activities to ensure their safety. Consult with a health care provider when deciding which exercises to pursue.
Companionship and emotional support can also foster stable mental and emotional health. Set a dedicated time to bond with your loved one and engage in meaningful conversations. For instance, you can reminisce and help them relive happy memories by looking at old photos or videos. You could also attend:
- Family functions.
- Adult day care programs.
- Church events.
- Outings or new experiences.
5. Work With Professional Home Care Services
Professional caregivers can share some or take all of the responsibilities. They can tailor their care services based on your loved one’s needs and preferences. Examples of care services include:
- Respite care: Respite caregivers care for your loved one while you run errands, go to appointments or take time off for yourself.
- Errand assistance: Errand assistance services help your aging loved one with everyday tasks, such as grocery shopping or attending a doctor’s appointment.
- Hygiene assistance: A caregiver will assist your loved one with grooming tasks, such as bathing and dental care.
- Companionship: A caregiver will engage in genuine conversations and perform activities that provide emotional support for your loved one.
- Cooking and eating assistance: A caregiver will prepare balanced and nutritious meals for your loved one while accompanying them during mealtime.
- Light housekeeping: A caregiver will perform light housekeeping tasks for your loved one.
- Veteran home care: These are support services that benefit veterans’ emotional well-being.
What Are the Do’s and Don’ts of a Caregiver?
It takes serious effort to become a caregiver. To adequately care for your loved one, remember to do the following:
- Determine your loved one’s medical condition: Your loved one’s health impacts the level of care they need. You should also anticipate how an illness might evolve over time, and whether you can utilize technology to manage medications. For instance, reminder apps and telehealth services can be effective. Consult with a health care provider regarding the allowed activities for your loved one.
- Learn when to ask for help: Create a list of important contact numbers, keep a copy and update the list regularly. Understand your own limits and know when you need support. Caregiving can be physically and emotionally demanding. You can work alongside other family members or professionals to offer the most effective care.
- Prioritize person-centered care: Person-centered care tailors care techniques to your loved one’s needs and preferences. For instance, you may need to help them bathe at the sink if they prefer not to bathe in the shower.
- Leave room for autonomy: Let your loved one maintain their independence as much as possible to keep them motivated and fulfilled. For instance, you may let them choose what they wear and when they can have their meals. Offer support only when necessary or when tasks are unsafe and difficult. This helps them keep their sense of control.
Additionally, remember to avoid the following when caring for your loved one:
- Disregarding your loved one’s boundaries: Remember to care for your loved one’s dignity. This means respecting their privacy, even when providing personal care. For instance, use a towel to cover exposed areas or close curtains when appropriate. Be mindful of their boundaries and ensure they feel comfortable with the care you provide.
- Neglecting medical support: Caregiving involves addressing your loved one’s medical needs, especially with chronic illnesses. In these instances, you may not have sufficient skills or resources to help them. You can work with health care providers and professional caregivers to manage the situation.
How to Navigate the Challenges of Caregiving
Caregiving can be rewarding and fulfilling, but it can come with challenges that bring about emotional and physical stress. Here’s how you can navigate such challenges:
Consider Working With Mental Health Professionals
Many professionals offer counseling, including therapists and social workers. They can help you manage stress and understand other feelings you may have, such as anger, sadness or overwhelm. They can also help you create plans for unexpected events and navigate them. You can receive counseling at home or in their office, or attend virtual counseling sessions.
Take Care of Yourself
You need to take care of yourself to care for your loved one well. Here are a few things you can do for your well-being:
- Maintain an active lifestyle: Just like your loved one, exercising regularly can help keep your health in top shape. Try activities you can enjoy and maintain, such as walking a pet, going for a run or dancing. Even short exercises can be sufficient.
- Prioritize rest and sleep: Taking regular breaks and getting enough sleep is essential. Try to get seven to nine hours of sleep each night and develop relaxing routines that help you unwind from your responsibilities.
- Eat healthy: Maintain a well-balanced diet and stay hydrated by drinking plenty of water daily. This can be easier to do as you plan healthy meals for your loved one.
- Manage stress levels: Managing stress levels protects your physical and mental health. Consider relaxing activities, like meditation and yoga, or listening to music you enjoy.
Review Eligibility for Government Programs
Caregiving costs can accumulate and contribute to your stress levels. However, some government programs pay for caring for your loved ones with disabilities. If your loved one receives Medicaid, you may benefit from a consumer-directed personal assistance program. The requirements and payments vary per state.
Various programs are also available for veterans. For instance, the Veteran-Directed Home and Community-Based Services program provides a flexible budget that lets veterans hire family members as caregivers. Long-term care insurance policies and paid family leave programs can also offer caregiving compensation.
Frequently Asked Questions
To properly care for your loved one, consider the following questions and answers:
What is the first rule of caregiving?
The first rule of caregiving is to take care of yourself first. This way, you can adequately and sustainably care for your loved one while reducing emotional and mental strain.
What do caregivers need the most?
Caregivers need many things, but emotional support is potentially what they need the most. Consider working with other family members and friends if the responsibilities get overwhelming. You can also work with home care services for professional support. Reach out to a counselor if you need help managing your emotions. A healthy lifestyle, including a nutritious diet and regular exercise, can also protect your overall health.
What is the hardest responsibility of a caregiver?
Juggling a full-time job with caregiving responsibilities is one of the hardest parts of being a caregiver. You need effective time management skills, while also having the mental, emotional and physical capacity to handle the work. It’s important to be disciplined with your tasks and your thoughts — you need to learn to avoid negative self-talk and worrying consistently.
Your Loved One’s Needs Are at the Heart of Home Care
When preparing to care for your loved one at home, their needs determine the right steps to take. You need to:
- Assess how many of those needs you can meet.
- Ensure it’s safe to move around your home.
- Create a meal plan tailored to your loved one’s dietary needs.
- Provide emotional support and encourage an active lifestyle.
- Work with professionals to alleviate the load.
The seriousness of the responsibilities also makes it essential to know the caregiving do’s and don’ts. Reaching out for support and opting for financial assistance can help you navigate the challenges. While your loved one is at the heart of the decisions you make, taking care of yourself first is of utmost priority. Caregiving is only effective if you’re also well-equipped mentally, emotionally and physically to perform the tasks.
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